Hey lovers– Wednesday is here, let's write it.
I'm happy to see you.. well... read you... well, be read by you. I'm listening to 'Out my mind, Just in Time' by Erykah Badu.... it's been stuck in my head for a couple of days... Shawnee Dez put me onto the song, she covered it once at a show of hers at the Promontory a few years back.... and I just..... felt the lyrics so deeply... so intrinsically at the time... and the tone of it is so gorgeous, which Shawnee portrayed elegantly!
"A recovering undercover, over-lover...." she says; Badu.. cut it out! Then she proceeds to name all of the ways she'll go in, and over, and above for this love– that she can't get over but is seemingly, over.
Wow, how many things can this apply to? So many, I think. It's been something I've been thinking about a lot in process. I'm in so many processes. It's truly something. Prayed for, asked for, hoped for, processes– that I am choosing to trust. And sometimes, with all these processes, and success, and not achievement, success... flowing, handling change, keeping my peace, staying grounded, present, open, brave... sheesh... sometimes my "recovering undercover over-lover" comes out! ghsdkbflidfblaighlhbdfila! Agh!!! Which I am no longer a slave to, or a fool for/to.... but sometimes the creepy crawlies of that time, a previous, precious time.. that worked together for my good, but didn't feel like success, it was not hoped for, it was not prayed for... the unwanted time– at least in my eyes and how I imagined it, my life, that is........sometimes I feel I'm still in recovery state within my new life...
Anyone else feel like that, ever? Hmmm.. I wonder.... luckily, I'm committed to recovery, and loving, and being bold, and authentic.. which means self-acceptance.. and radical self love (I'm still digesting that phrase).... and so because I'm committed, all I have to do is wait for the dust to settle.... and continue to rise...
I think I can do dat... already am. Hope you are too, cuz you can...and anytime you pound the pavement, you are. Finding balance is....
dope, and hard, and fulfilling.
Welp, that's all I have for the page... like the second portion of the song: Just in Time. Like my entire lived, and shared experience right now: just, in time. keep living y'all.. keep living.
Sending love on your journey through... I'm happy to be here, and I'm damn proud of me.... and that is what the fuck is up! Follow suit, my dear. Clear the Hump on this Hump Day.
With all of my love, until next time,
Mrs. Jasmin Dominique Taylor