Out with the old and in with the new...
Mamas keeping it simple and to the point today. Tomorrow, April 23rd, 2020 my newest single 'Betrayal' will premier via video recording. I'm quite excited.
Here's the thing, this new music is different. It's even more honest and vulnerable, which if you're a CV listener, I know you're thinking how is that even possible? It just is. When you're going deeper in your self-work, more comes up and out, and blessedly I've channelled my life experiences to be able to communicate them and hopefully bless and minister to/with the masses. Each experience and phase of life is different, so this new music will reflect some of where I've been and how I now am focused and committed to where I am, knowing that it'll lead me to where I'm going.
The content of 'Betrayal' is unlike anything I've put out before. It's not just about the fight to persevere or continue on, or about all the joy we have inside... at the end of the day, that's is what it's about... but in order to get there as Brene Brown so eloquently puts it in her book 'The Gifts of Imperfection' we have to talk about the stuff that "gets in the way" of attaining more happiness, joy, love, knowing our worth.... so... I did. I'm owning my life experiences, and choosing to see how the rest of the story unfolds as I dare to move through the trenches step by step.
All in all, I've been betrayed... by family. by myself, and at many times convinced myself that I've been betrayed by God, and I've had enough. I've had enough betrayal. I've had enough mistrusting my intuition, I've had enough saying yes when I mean no, and no when I mean yes. I've had enough of allowing people to attack me and not standing up for myself, I've had enough of being angry with people who should've protected me that didn't and I've had enough of being angry with and betraying myself for being human and going through the clusterfuck of emotions that hits you when your trust has taken a/ continuous hits.
So, I wrote a song about it. And the song is a part of a much bigger project that I'm working on that's so good and so full and so colorful, and real, and just... good. It's a good thing. Although I'm a bit nervous about some of the reception when it comes to 'Betrayal' because of my stark honesty, I know that there's no malice in my heart, and that my intention isn't to bash or blame, simply to share my testimony and to honor the truth at this moment in time. Notice I didn't say my truth, I said the truth. Regardless of the fact that it's going to maybe hurt some feelings or bring up some feelings, I've decided to be okay with that and lean into it. Simply put, because I can... and this hook is cold, and so are the lyrics, and so am I, and God put these words, this melody and this song in me intentionally at this time, and it's being released in this time... so I'm choosing faith over fear and courage over comfort and putting myself out there because this is my life's work... No longer ignoring the call or acting like I haven't been chosen, I'm working cuz God said so... and I have to know that even when people claim that's not what they're getting. I'm having my OWN experience, as you should.
So with that said, I hope you tune in. I hope you listen. I think in every artists' life every time you release something new it's a: Put your money where your mouth is moment... like uhh.... yeah... okay... I actually do do this shit, like... I forreal make music and dance and I'm not mediocre, or average, and those aren't bad things, they also aren't me. I don't necessarily hear my sound or content a lot, I do feel like I'm forging a different lane, and to some degree taking the scenic route, and it feels unpopular and weird.. and sometimes I almost get caught wishing and wanting everyone to like my shit.. but I have to remind myself... this is me, and I love me, and am proud of me and me is doing the damn thing, regardless of outside opinions.
So with that said, I'll be posting the video tomorrow of the live recording, world premiere of my new Jam entitled 'Betrayal' I know it may sound crazy, but I'm expecting it to chart... not saying when, don't really care... my faith is just that high, and the anointing is even higher, and the favor EVEN HIGHER.
Don't let self-doubt or fear steer you away from celebrating your wins or furthermore for creating them before you get to celebration station. I made something, helpful and beautiful to me, and I decided to share it with the world and I hope it ministers to you as it ministers to me... and encourages you to say the hard things, but the things that need to be said... because without betrayal, there can be no forgiveness... so it is about that persevering.. just a different part of it.
With all of my love,